Odessa “OJ” Jenkins grew up in sports — she was a Division 1 basketball athlete and started playing football at the age of 27. At the same time, she was making huge strides in the technology sector, working as the chief operating officer of a tech firm. A football player and coach who also leads tech firms, Jenkins founded the Women’s National Football Conference, which has become one of the fastest-growing sports leagues in the world, with 17 teams. She’s also the CEO of Bonfire, an organization that accelerates talent development for women in order to accelerate business.

Jenkins took the stage at the 2024 Women in Retail Leadership Summit, hosted by our sister brand, Women in Retail Leadership Circle, to share what she’s learned over her lifetime about being her authentic self and leading while she climbs.

“Being your authentic self in the context of your personal and psychological being is really just closing the gap between what you feel, what you believe, and what you show the world,” Jenkins told the audience. “If you want to accelerate where you want to go, you need to smash that gap between who you are, what you believe, what you stand for, and what you show the world.”

Through two simple acronyms, Jenkins shared eight ways to do that:

Use the SAFE Acronym

  • Self-aware: Jenkins said it starts with having a deep understanding of your own values, beliefs and emotions. Ask yourself questions every day like, “Who am I today?” “What do I care about?” “What do I love?” “What do I want?”
  • Be Accountable for your actions: Jenkins said accountability isn’t counting people out, it’s calling people up. Calling yourself up to the challenge, not calling yourself out.
  • Eat Fear for breakfast: “Whatever you’re afraid of … eat that for breakfast. Start the day with that. Consume it, address it, and then move on so you can really present who you want to present,” said Jenkins.
  • Remember you are Exceptional: “You are the only you in the world,” Jenkins reminded the audience.

Do it With EASE

  • Emotional regulation: Jenkins said she’s had to learn to quiet herself in moments and temper her passions so people can hear her. That means she knows her self-described hot-headedness isn’t always appropriate.
  • Awareness: Be aware of your surroundings and your environment and read the room, Jenkins said. Always be aware of the moment you’re having.
  • Self-Talk: We have more things happening in our head than outside our head, and we talk to ourselves way more often than anyone talks to us, Jenkins said. That’s why positive self-talk is critical to being your authentic self. She suggested taking a page from relationship expert John Gottman’s book and saying five positive things to yourself for every one negative thing you think.
  • Elasticity (i.e., your ability to be flexible and deal with change): “Your ability to deal with external change and external forces and be flexible to them is critical to you being an authentic leader,” Jenkins said.